(A brief drama for Berowra Uniting Church, Christmas 2000)
Synopsis
Just as there was no room for Jesus at his birth, sometimes we still don’t have time or room for Jesus. God still interrupts our complacency by knocking on our windows just as persistently as always. So in this drama we mix the age-old story of Mary and Joseph looking for a room in Bethlehem with the modern Australian Christmas holiday rush.
At the front of the church (in front of the stage) there is a table which represents the inn. In the background (on the stage) there is an unordered assortment of nativity props.
Actors
Customer (Brian)
Inn-keeper (Matt) — very Australian and a bit rough-edged
Inn-keeper’s wife (Rosalie)
Mary (Jacqueline) — pregnant, and noticeably ‘Biblical’ in costume and speech
Joseph (Paul) — noticeably ‘Biblical’ in costume and speech
Script
| Customer | [Brings a chair to the table, sits and reads the menu] Inn-keeper! Inn-keeper!! What does a man have to do to get some service here? |
| Inn-keeper | I’m sorry sir, we’ve been run off our feet tonight. How can I help? |
| Customer | I’ll just have some coffee please. |
| Inn-keeper | Sure. [Calls out] Wife! Some coffee please. [Sits down] |
| Well I’m glad it’s the end of the night. We’ve really been busy. Full up all this week and probably next week as well. You were lucky you booked a room ahead of time. Where are you from? | |
| Customer | Just come down up from Dubbo to spend Christmas with mum. She’s in the nursing home, you know. I hope this rain disappears by tomorrow so I can take her out for a while. |
| Inn-keeper | Yeah, it’s been pretty heavy today. |
| [Mary knocks on the door, but nobody notices.] | |
| Customer | Say, do you know anything about churches round here. I don’t normally go, but it is Christmas, so I thought I might look in tomorrow morning. |
| Inn-keeper | Sure. There’s the Uniting Church just down the road. The minister puts on a pretty good show. We’ll be going there so you can follow us if you like. Starts at 8 I think. |
| [The knocking at the side door has continued, and eventually the customer notices. He indicates to the inn-keeper that there is someone at the door.] | |
| Inn-keeper | [To wife] Hey honey! Go and see who’s at the door. Tell them we’re closed. |
| [Wife goes to the door and opens it.] | |
| Mary | I’m sorry we’re so late, but I was hoping that you would still have a spare room for us. |
| Wife | Oh dear, it really is a bit late, and we’re completely full. |
| [Aside, to inn-keeper] It’s a young couple looking for a room. | |
| Mary | We have been travelling for so long and have tried all the other inns but there’s no room anywhere. |
| Wife | [To inn-keeper] These two are drenched and it looks like she’s pregnant. Can’t we do something for them? |
| Inn-keeper | Well do you want to give up your bed? [She doesn’t respond.] OK, I’ll go talk to them. |
| [To customer] Foreigners! You’d think they’d plan their holidays better than this! | |
| [Wife goes to table; inn-keeper goes to door] | |
| Joseph | I really am sorry, but we’ve come from so far away, and all the way on a donkey. Surely there must be somewhere we can just bed down for the night? |
| Inn-keeper | It doesn’t matter where you’re from or what you’re on: it’s Christmas for goodness sake! We’ve been booked out for months. |
| Joseph | Look, all we need is somewhere out of this rain. Haven’t you got a stable or something? |
| Inn-keeper | Stable? Yeah, we got a stable. Well, more like a chook shed really, but you’re welcome to it. Just go out there and round the back. You’ll see it. |
| [As they go] I just hope you don’t wake up with egg on your faces! Ha! | |
| [Mary and Joseph go out the other side door and out of sight.] | |
| [Inn-keeper returns to the table.] | |
| Customer | They’ll be lucky if the chooks only drop eggs on their faces!!! |
| [Customer and Inn-keeper laugh.] | |
| Inn-keeper | You know how sometimes a song just goes round and round in your head and you can’t get rid of it? It must be the rain I guess, but there’s this song called ‘Standing in the Rain’ which I’ve been singing to myself all day. You wanna hear it? |
| Customer | [Politely embarrassed laugh] Well sure, if you have to. |
| Inn-keeper | [Keenly] Wife! Where’s my guitar? |
| [Inn-keeper and wife rummage through a music book, stand and sing ‘Standing in the Rain’.] | |
| Inn-keeper | That’s a funny song, eh! I love that bit ‘Just as long as he’s not black, sir’. I mean, it’s not as though Jesus was black, hey? |
| Customer | I thought it was meaning we really shouldn’t be concerned about whether he was black or not. Or Jewish. Or gay. Or anything. |
| Inn-keeper | Yeah, maybe. I never really thought about the meaning. I just like the way it changes from Dm to Bb! |
| Customer | What’s the bit ‘Standing in the rain, knocking on the window’ about? |
| Wife | I think it’s saying that we like being in our comfortable living rooms, but there’s a nagging thought that there must be more to life than that. It’s like God is the one out in the rain, knocking on the window, but sometimes we just try to ignore him and hope he’ll go away. |
| [Pause] | |
| Customer | It’s a bit like those strangers tonight really. |
| Inn-keeper | Yeah, I guess so. |
| But let’s forget that and sing something a bit more Christmassy. | |
| Customer | OK. What about ‘Away in a Manger’? |
| [Congregation all sing ‘Away in a Manger’. Inn-keeper and wife return to the congregation.] | |
| [During the Carol, Joseph and Mary walk onto the stage from the rear entrance. They silently arrange the props into a nativity scene and take their places to sleep for the night.] |